Last Weekend in Review - Line Dancing, Respect, and Duck Tours
Friday night started off well enough. We had an Asian dessert party at work that included some fancy named thing that was actually pork spareribs stuffed into a roll. For that I'd like to give a shout out to God for finally answering my prayers.
After work it was off to meet my friend Sandy, et al., in Waltham. For those of you not in the know, Waltham is the Karaoke Capital of Massachusetts. Now, you would think I would know myself better than to assume anything good could come out of the equation of Booze + Me + Microphone, but I went anyhow with the intention of having a few laughs and hanging out with Sandy and other friends from Curves.
Fast forward two hours into the night - I've already broken my karaoke seal by belting out a hip hop version of "Do You Know the Way to San Jose?" by Dionne Warwick (with a smooth robot dancing routine during the musical interlude) and now it's on. There is a mentally disabled woman named Lucy who lives near the bar and from what I understand frequents the karaoke scene around town and together we did a great rendition of "Endless Love" - me being Lionel Ritchie of course. The rest of the night in Waltham is a bit of a blur but I know that I was teaching line dancing to Lucy and Sandy at some point and I took the job very seriously because after a few drinks I truly believe that I am a Solid Gold Dancer who needs to share her gift with the world.
Sandy gave me a ride back to Brighton around 11ish and in some parallel universe, a universe where I am a good decent, non-self destructive human being, the night ends there. BUT NO! I need to over-do it by calling my friend Jessica and insisting she meet me for a drink or five. The usual good clean funniness ensued, again it’s sort of a blur but I do know that on Saturday my mother/landlord ("Jude") told me if I ever played the music that loud so late again she would not only call the cops but she would let them in with the spare key so they could sneak up and startle us causing chaos and a certain arrest. And many wonder where I get my insanity from.....
If cleaning the house, doing laundry and going grocery shopping equates to sleeping in, eating ones weight in McDonalds and watching TV then I accomplished everything I had set out to do on Saturday and I’m quite proud of myself.
Sunday it was off to the Stuart Street Theater to see the show "Respect" with my mother Jude and the ladies from Curves. It was a hokey musical journey through the history of women (quote/unquote minus the hokey) but it was entertaining enough. The only real interesting thing I recall is that Jude and I drove a group there that included one of the ladies who was there on Friday night who proceeded to narrate in great detail my "hilarious" karaoke escapades. Dammit don’t people know I like to keep my drunk and sober world completely separate???!? This led Jude to come to the conclusion that I should become a tour guide because I am so good with people. I don’t ask for elaboration when she starts talking crazy like that. Really, her dream for me is to drive the Duck Tour? What the fuck....
After work it was off to meet my friend Sandy, et al., in Waltham. For those of you not in the know, Waltham is the Karaoke Capital of Massachusetts. Now, you would think I would know myself better than to assume anything good could come out of the equation of Booze + Me + Microphone, but I went anyhow with the intention of having a few laughs and hanging out with Sandy and other friends from Curves.
Fast forward two hours into the night - I've already broken my karaoke seal by belting out a hip hop version of "Do You Know the Way to San Jose?" by Dionne Warwick (with a smooth robot dancing routine during the musical interlude) and now it's on. There is a mentally disabled woman named Lucy who lives near the bar and from what I understand frequents the karaoke scene around town and together we did a great rendition of "Endless Love" - me being Lionel Ritchie of course. The rest of the night in Waltham is a bit of a blur but I know that I was teaching line dancing to Lucy and Sandy at some point and I took the job very seriously because after a few drinks I truly believe that I am a Solid Gold Dancer who needs to share her gift with the world.
Sandy gave me a ride back to Brighton around 11ish and in some parallel universe, a universe where I am a good decent, non-self destructive human being, the night ends there. BUT NO! I need to over-do it by calling my friend Jessica and insisting she meet me for a drink or five. The usual good clean funniness ensued, again it’s sort of a blur but I do know that on Saturday my mother/landlord ("Jude") told me if I ever played the music that loud so late again she would not only call the cops but she would let them in with the spare key so they could sneak up and startle us causing chaos and a certain arrest. And many wonder where I get my insanity from.....
If cleaning the house, doing laundry and going grocery shopping equates to sleeping in, eating ones weight in McDonalds and watching TV then I accomplished everything I had set out to do on Saturday and I’m quite proud of myself.
Sunday it was off to the Stuart Street Theater to see the show "Respect" with my mother Jude and the ladies from Curves. It was a hokey musical journey through the history of women (quote/unquote minus the hokey) but it was entertaining enough. The only real interesting thing I recall is that Jude and I drove a group there that included one of the ladies who was there on Friday night who proceeded to narrate in great detail my "hilarious" karaoke escapades. Dammit don’t people know I like to keep my drunk and sober world completely separate???!? This led Jude to come to the conclusion that I should become a tour guide because I am so good with people. I don’t ask for elaboration when she starts talking crazy like that. Really, her dream for me is to drive the Duck Tour? What the fuck....
posted by Betty Blog at 4:26 AM
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